Just Another…

Well, it’s Monday. For most people, Monday means a return to the grueling grind of daily life, but, for me, Monday is sacred. It’s the one and only day of the week where I can truly dedicate myself to my writing as a career. Very rarely do I have any obligations on a Monday these days, so I settle myself in with a bunch of notebooks, my laptop, and plenty of coffee and tea to set to work on my writing from nine to five like an actual job. Typically, I intend to get a lot done on those Mondays; sometimes, I accomplish great things, other days are kind of a bust, but if I didn’t have those Mondays, I’d be shocked if I got anything done at all. Today’s a big day; I’ve been crazy busy lately, so I’m hoping to catch up on my short story goal, do a little bit of reading, update my resume, and perhaps even get my Federal income taxes out of the way. Not to mention this is also the day when I get my laundry done and clean up after my slobbish self a little bit.

That’s an awful lot to fit into one day. This needs to change. I’ve been saying that all month, in the grand effort to rework my life into the life I want to be living, but the life I’m currently living seems to have different plans, reinstating itself so firmly that I can’t seem to find two minutes towards the changes I want to make. The biggest issue there is my current job. I feel crazy for doing this, but I truly, truly need to find a new job. In a world where the economy and employment seems to be a struggling and elusive thing, to give up a full-time position with a growing company feels nothing short of crazy. But the fact of the matter is that it demands so much from me and it’s only going to continue to demand more. It makes more financial and economic sense to stick with it, especially since there’s talks of another promotion, but is it any good for my soul? I can’t do what I really want to do because I’m spending so much time on something I’m just doing “because it’s smart.” As a result, I really don’t think I’m as happy as I could be.

I am probably one of the few people out there looking to “downgrade” to a part time position. It’s definitely a risk, but risk is something I find must be welcomed with open arms and taken with vigor and excitement. It gives you the drive to succeed, despite adverse situations. It’s interesting that I’m giving this particular thought right now; it was around this time four years ago that my fiance unexpectedly passed away, throwing my life into a big upheaval and forcing me to accept risk and change. And now I find myself yet again eagerly accepting it, doing something that others might think is a little crazy and against conventional wisdom, but I know, deep down, it’s what I need to do if I want to start the life I want to be living.

When we stay safe in where we know things will be okay, we still take a risk, and that is the risk of never living up to your potential. It’s only when you take a chance that great things can truly happen. I’m about to do something that some people will classify as foolish, but I know it’s the right path to make me happy. Wish me luck, guys.